I'm borrowing your bowling club riff, Beryl. Have you seen Byrd's latest dispatch? The bowling club has charged her with irreverence, deceitfulness and failing to get permission to express her views. She was told that a vote was taken to disinvite her from club events. (Heh. Since when does the bowling club ever get to vote on anything?)
This is not a "cultural misunderstanding." This is shunning, a form of relational aggression. As Beryl said, the club is not about bowling. It's about money, politics and control.
I'm confident that Byrd is a strong woman and will handle the situation in the way that's best for her. She doesn't need my advice. I am more worried about the widespread damage done by decades of shunning and similar behavior in the Nichiren community, and the unhealed emotional wounds that make our collective sangha a crappy place to be a lot of the time.
Seriously, I sometimes think that the only people who will be able practice and propagate the Lotus Sutra in the U.S. are the people who never had anything to do with the bowling club.
The bowling club has damaged a lot of bodhisattvas. Some don't even seem to realize how deeply they've been hurt.
Some defenders of the bowling club say that the club is not abusive because the club does not beat people up, steal from them, make violent physical threats or make them do anything they don't want to do. My position is that emotional abuse is a lot more complicated and subtle than that, but no less hurtful.
The bowling club employs relational aggression:
Relational aggression is psychological (social/emotional) aggression between people in relationships. Relational aggression is a form of aggression where the group is used as a weapon to assault others and others' relationships. It uses lies, secrets, betrayals and other dishonest tactics to destroy or damage the relationships and social standing of others in the group. Also known as covert bullying, social aggression, "female bullying", family bullying or serial bullying, it is a covert form of aggression, used by both men and women in relationships. It is less well-known than physical forms of aggression and therefore much more difficult to detect. Often, the victim may not know the abuser is lying or gossiping about the victim, and the abuser may even pretend to befriend the victim.
Sound familiar?
Even after people leave the bowling club, they continue to use the relational aggression techniques they internalized in the bowling club. You can see evidence of this online -- lies, gossip and paranoia often dominate discussion on private message boards frequented by former bowling club members. In the real world (offline) it's just as bad.
My experience is that "friends" with whom I remained in contact after leaving the club were chatting me up to find out my thoughts and plans, then were reporting my statements to bowling club leaders. I mean, WTF?
After a long, ugly stint of exposure to relational aggression in the bowling club, I came to associate the practice of chanting with this type of abuse -- I conflated the two. So I quit chanting and started sitting meditation practice. It took me years to untangle chanting from all the paranoid, backbiting, gossiping bullshit I had associated with it.
Maybe I haven't fully succeeded -- I have no patience or fondness now for people obsessed (negatively or posititvely) with the bowling club -- but I hope I'm upfront with them about what I really think and feel.
Some people out there have successfully extricated themselves from the bowling club and are reasonably unscathed. They're the exception, not the rule.
To answer the question Do We Really Need a New Sangha? -- I say yes. We need a sangha devoted to curbing relational aggression as much as its devoted to celebrating Namu-myoho-renge-kyo.
14 comments
There is growing credible evidence that the Gakkai in Japan goes a bit beyond relational aggression. A Hokkeko person who I consider a cyber Dharma Friend posted a link recently at SGU. It talked about shadowing people, spying on them, and other rather aggressive acts of intimidation; specifically to keep someone quiet. It appears to me that President Ikeda has become a very jealous mentor; thou shalt take no mentor before Him. People such as myself are viewed as ingrates; who are bedeviled by arrogant pride and envy. We are compared to Devadatta; so I guess, by extension, they are saying President Ikeda is the Buddha? The thing is, I like much, well some, of what is attributed to Mr. Ikeda. I have issues with the SGI take on the mentor-disciple issue; I think Nichiren's comments on Patriarchal Zen and Shingon's esoteric transmissions ably refute the general need for a living mentor. Nichiren saw the Lotus & Nirvana Sutras as the only valid teachers, for the public at large, in this age. A mentor is still useful for teaching hands on skills. For example, a person who wishes to be a Nichiren Shu Minister needs a Sensei to show them the ropes. Even in society, an athlete needs a coach or trainer to improve. Of course, those situations involve a one on one, give and take relationship. Moreover, I suspect that personal coaching was really what Patriarchal Zen was about. Nichiren did not appear to oppose that per se, he questioned the motives and qualification of teachers like Nonin. He wrote that the popular school {Nippon Daruma Shu} violated their own teachings; an assessment Dogen and other qualified Zen teachers concurred with. I bring this up because it appears that enforcing Mr. Ikeda as the sole mentor is the raison d'etre for the de facto creation of provisional quasi-thought police, to monitor members and detect / punish ingrates. They wish to ensure that members do not commit thought crimes; that they only read authorized publications, hold authorized views, associate with other loyal followers, and so on. gasshorobin, a dangerous ingrate and known thought criminal.
What is happening to Byrd is similar to what has happened to friends of mine as well. I can say this comfortably from behind my pseudonym, but that is why I use a pseudonym. I am no longer willing to be a target for misguided fanatics. I have heard stories much worse than Byrd's, similar to what robin hints at. (robin, what is SGU?) I don't want to traffic in gossip and innuendo, however, so I will say no more about specific incidents. I will say only that I am not surprised.
SokaGakkaiUnofficial http://groups.yahoo.com/group/...One correction, I am not certain the person who posted the link is Hokkeko. I had that impression in the past. I do have e-friends who are {gasp} Hokkeko, or at least were recently. I know of several Hokkeko members who are moving more toward Nichiren Shu doctrine.gasshorobin
The thing that bothers me the most about the MDrelationship as profligated by the SGI is that itis just about PI as the MASTER. Jeez. I have notrouble with the concept, it is just that I havemany "masters", such as Shakyamuni, Socrates, Homer,Elai Weisel, Martin Luther King, Jr., NDaishonin,Gandhi (one of my absolute faves), Nelson Mandela...not to mention Mr. Makuguchi and Mr. Toda themselves.I don't need PI to run interference for me with them,though I do consider PI a significant mentor, too,when he is not preaching hate and division and worship of the person (him) and touting his honorarydegrees (which makes me green with illness). Whosays we should have just ONE, anyway? So limiting.Regards,Armchair (also knows by Bruce as "Folding Chair"when he is NOT invited to my living room). Shallwe say "Bye, Brucie", or no? Mebbe better strike that soonish, Beryl!! Please be selective this timeand leave the good parts, okay?Signed,Apostate among many
Armchair, please don't taunt chogenki. Better to let him go his own way and wish him well.I can't help but notice the jargon in this threadMD relationship -- does it refer to a bond with one's doctor? President Ikeda -- president who? Of what? In the U.S. the only people who are referred to as president are U.S. presidents such as Clinton, Kennedy, Lincoln, etc. PI -- a private investigator? No, it's short for this mysterious President Ikeda.Hokkeko -- Is this supposed to be something sinister? Gakkai? Nichiren Shu? Sorry, this is inside baseball for most of us. Believe it or not, most Americans are oblivious to whatever subtleties these terms are supposed to convey. This jargon has no meaning for the average chanting novice. Does a chanter need to know any of this? Would his or her practice be enhanced by knowing it? No on both counts.Why is it so hard to ditch the lingo?To ditch the lingo, maybe you also have to ditch -- or at least reconsider -- the feuds, rivalries, wounds and regrets that go with the words. But the feuds, rivalries, wounds and regrets are so old and unresolvable that they've become comfortable and reassuring. One knows who one is by virtue of where one stands within a matrix of contentious detail that is utterly meaningless for most other people.Is that it?
Yes, it is extremely useful, likely needed to make progress. It is really up to the newbie to look into it.
Certainly not sinister in my mind. It is simply the lay wing of Nichiren Shoshu. Ay any rate, lingo is kind of short hand. I might say the "5 skandhas" or the "4 main rupa dhyanas." A Buddhist who has done some homework knows of what I speak; I do not have to go into details. Having done my homework, I can go into rather tedious details. :)gasshoI agree with robin that jargon is useful at times. Any body of specialized knowledge will have its own terms and phrases. Have you ever listened to the way medical doctors talk with one another in a professional setting?At the same time, excessive jargon can be off-putting to newcomers. If you wish to reach a general audience, jargon will have to be translated into lay terms or avoided.With regard to Nichiren Buddhism, I wonder how much specialized knowledge is essential to practice. The specialized knowledge involving various sects, their differences and disagreements is vast. I doubt that any of it is essential to chanting.
This seemed to stray from the initial topic. However, it inspired me. Is Buddhist jargon; or technical knowledge essential? Probably not for a stream enterer. However, wrong knowledge can do harm. It is not so much the jargon, but what it means is highly useful, for one who wishes to truly benefit from Buddhism. As for putting off new people, marketing Buddhism to the messes is not my gig. I suspect that almost anything that has too much popular appeal is probably not worth pursuing.I know that might seem sardonic, or worse, elitist. I just wonder at what point does changing Nichiren's teaching, so that it is not much different from other popular self help schemes, turn it in to something other than Buddhism? A friend once told me that he liked Soka Gakkai because it taught what he already believed. My reaction was, why bother then? Why do we practice Buddhism? Is it so we can stay as are, and receive some self affirmation to build up our self esteem? If someone takes the practice of chanting Namu Myoho Renge Kyo; while gazing at the Mandala Gohonzon, things should start happening. Things like Dharma Lists of Buddhist terms are useful in sorting out one's experiences. I know, in retrospect, that I would have been better off had I pursued earlier what I now pursue. Instead, I was swayed by guidance that we do not really need to understand anything, that all we have to do is do it. In the old days, we talked about achieving Kosen Rufu, which we also called world peace. As Mr, Ikeda used to say, doing so requires a fundamental change in human beings. What changes? How? Buddhist teachings answer those questions. As for technical knowledge about the different sects, I have only a marginal interest in that. I think Nichikan, who [not Nikko] was really the founder of Nichiren Shoshu, made some serious doctrinal errors. Does it really matter if we see Shakyamuni or Nichiren as the Buddha? My answer is yes, that is vital. It is also important to know that by Shakyamuni, we mean the triple bodied tathagata of Chapter 16 of the Lotus Sutra. The other sects, such as Zen and Ritsu, revered Shakyamuni as only the Manifest Body {Nirmana-Kaya}. They saw Amida as the Reward-body {Sambogha-kaya}, and Dainichi as the Truth Body {Dharma- Kaya}. When Nichiren Buddhists enshrine a statue of Shakyamuni, it represents all three bodies, not just the manifest historical person. Nikko once objected to a statue of Shakyamuni Buddha as a Honzon, because Hakii understood it in the Zen sense. So Nikko insisted that it should be flanked by statues of the 4 attendants {BoE}. Niko {one k}, thought it sufficient to consecrate it as the triple bodied Shakyamuni, or Eternal Buddha, as Nichiren had done on other occassions. Nikko was not saying that Nichiren is the Eternal Buddha. Nikko wrote: " ... the Lord of Teachings of Namu-myoho- renge-kyo, Shakyamuni Buddha enlightened from remote ages past; which is the reason for Nichiren Shonin's appearance in this World."Is that important to know? Maybe only if we were taught a distorted version of the story.Does Nam' or Namu matter? My answer is yes, though chanting both ways, or more correctly, all three ways, is fine. It becomes an issue when I hear SGI members making fun of Namu; when Namu is actually technically correct -- Nam' is like an elision or contraction. Should one know what is written on the Gohonzon? My answer is that helps a whole bunch. Again, here, we have some problematic Nichikan doctrines. For example, it does not have Nam Myoho Remge Kyo Nichiren written down the middle. It has Namu Myoho Renge Kyo wtitten down the middle. Nichiren signed his name at the bottom, sometimes in the center, sometimes off to one side. That is important to know; it goes to the symbolism of what is written on the Mandala. People tell me they do not want to learn about the details of the Gohonzon, meditative states, cultivations, the 5 skandhas, the 6 8, or 9 consciousnesses, and all that stuff. They just want to chant, overcome obstacles, and get what they want. I say that is like keeping the chaff, and throwing the wheat, Or like exchanging jewels for pebbles. Finally, I do not think it has to be complex for a beginner. I do think beginners would do better if they were taught authentic Nichiren Buddhism. Then, the hunger and thirst to learn more will naturally emerge, from a correct practice and the awakening of faith and trust that this really works. That is how it worked for me. First, I spent 20 years learning the wrong things. Next another eleven unlearning them. Then, in July of 2003, 31 years after joining Soka Gakkai, my practice of Buddhism started. I am in no way bitter or angry about this. If I were, that would mean I was still controlled by self centered greed, hatred, and delusion. That is the whole point of Buddhism; to overcome those things. All of conditioned existence is dukkha -- it is suffering, stressful, and unsatisfying. We suffer because we make our happiness conditional on transient things. It is possible to live a life that is truly satisfying. One way to do this is by chanting Namu Myoho Renge Kyo; which taps into our inherent virtues of innocent purity, unconditional bliss, atemporal constancy, and an authentic sense of who we are.So, we do not require a lot of technical knowledge to do that. Correct technical is useful, while incorrect technical knowledge is a hindrance that can lead us in circles. It might be better, for some, to start with a simple faith, do the practice, ignore the jargon and sectarian claims; then pursue higher learning when the need and want awakens. bowing with palms together,robin
Robin, this is good stuff. Would you create a diary from this comment so I can feature it in the center column? (I would cut and paste it into a diary myself, but then it would say "beryl" instead of "robin.") Thanks.
As fellow dead guy Blaise Pascal (famous mathematical genius and religious fanatic) noted:"Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction."
From Jon Petry"
I am confident that is really Jon, who is President of NONA.I only mention these things hoping SGI members will look into the incidents and maybe speak out. This is not my preferred sort of topic to discuss. For some reason, I do not concentrate so well when reading this kind of report. :{Now, if it were some obscure fine point of Abhidharma ... :}gassho with mettarobinRobin, the whole story is on e-sangha. Don't you hang out there anymore?
John, even I have a limited amount of time. Right now, I prefer this site, plus Taiten & Gohonzon Forum had some activity. I do check in at e-sangha, but I almost never look at the SGI sub-sub-sub-sub forum there.gassho robin
It may seem like a whole story, but it is not. There are questions, some information, answers and equivocations. It would appear that the Bowling Club have made errors and assumptions, but as the Bowling Club have made no comment or reply it is not possible to call anything a whole story.There is My Truth - Your Truth and The Whole Truth!What is evident is that the Bowling Club have a problem with Business Cards and assume that anyone with a Business Card is attempting to take members away.I wonder how many Bowling Club Members have left and become accountants or plumbers after getting contact details they have asked for?