Are you a member of a group that supports your spiritual development and, in Buddhist terms, your movement toward liberation? Or does the group stunt your spiritual growth? Here's a quick comparison to help you tell the difference between a group that holds you down and a group that helps you soar.
A group that respects your individual autonomy lifts you up.

A group that expects or enforces compliance holds you down.

A vibrant group tolerates and even encourages questions and independent, critical thinking.

A spiritless group discourages questions and independent, critical thinking.

A healthy group encourages psycho-spiritual integration.

An unhealthy group "splits" members into a "good self" which lives up to group ideals and the "bad self" which must be overcome or eradicated.

Conversion to a genuine spiritual path involves an unfolding of internal processes central to your individual identity.

Conversion to a cult of personality involves surrender to an external authority or leader who knows little about and cares little for your individual identity.

A constructive group tries to help individuals meet their spiritual needs by providing opportunities for fellowship and study.

A destructive group exploits spiritual needs to make members increasingly dependent on the group for fellowship and study.

Ethical groups view money as a means -- subject to accountability and transparency -- toward achieving noble ends.

Unethical groups view money as an end or as a means toward achieving power, influence or the goals of the leader, with little or no concern for accountability and transparency.

Ethical groups respond to critics respectfully.

Unethical groups frequently intimidate critics with threats of legal action or "voodoo" threats -- such as, "If you criticize us, you will be punished by supernatural forces."

Ethical groups encourage a person to think carefully before making a commitment to join. They encourage prospective members to look up more information about the group online.

Unethical groups encourage quick decisions with little information. They fear online criticism of the group and preemptively tell prospective members to mistrust information from "unapproved" sources.

(As part of a series I plan to write about Spiritual Self-Defense, I adapted this comparison from "Guidelines for Clergy" by Rev. Richard L. Dowhower, which appears in the book Recovery From Cults, edited by Michael D. Langone, Ph.D.)